Grudge

Hi to all those people struggling to manage their unhealthy emotions. In the previous article we discussed what is hurt? And what the common causes of hurt are. In today’s article we will discover ways to manage this emotion. But before we proceed we need to understand what a grudge is?

Imagine while walking you are carrying heavy books on your head or shoulders. Note how heavy it becomes as you carry those as you walk. This is what it is like to carry grudges for life. Most of the negative emotions take place when we do not have unconditional love for ourselves. 

Few are the following steps that if we remind ourselves daily, we can manage our unhealthy emotions effectively: 

Self-acceptance: is where you separate who you are as a person from your behavior and only rate the latter. You then apply the concept in reverse, to the person whom you believe has treated you unfairly. Forgive the person as it assists YOU not them, but feel free to challenge and rate their behaviors or actions.  

Gratitude: Challenge yourself to think about the times people were helpful, or kind, or generous to you. You will focus on the positives and it will help you let go of hypersensitivity, sullen silences and verbal outbursts. 

Practice the turtle exercise: Imagine someone said something that really hurt you or made you angry. Go into your shell and process your emotions rather than lashing out. This may involve addressing the behavior rather than the individual. For example “It hurts me when you ignore me” rather than “You always ignore me because you are selfish”.

These practices will really help you drop your grudge or hurt as it only harming you not the person or the situation. Hope this helps. See you soon. 

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